what can we do, when there is nothing much we can do?

Senses weaken.

There is so little to hold on.

Can we still dance with the memories we had?

There is so little to hold on.

I (fill in the blank) you

Zap the days.

I wished its August tomorrow.

i am 24, none the wiser

For the longest time, i thought i will be wise when i hit 24. Just like being poke by a magic wand inflated with wisdom, i would be prudent and careful enough to make every single decision. I would understand things that i cannot explain.



At the age of 17, being simple, I thought so.

Being 18, seethed with agitation, i agreed that is an ideal target.

19, boiled with ambitious ideas, I believed there is nothing i cannot achieve.

Four years is plenty for an individual to grow up, I thought so at 20.

Being anal and smart ass at 21, I have zero doubt about that idea.

At the age 22, hopelessly in love I was, being wise at 24 was not my major concern.

I screwed 23 with assignments, heartbreaks and of course, dramas.

Now, at 24, besides a few fine wrinkles appeared, i am not knowing anymore than before. I am, indeed, more confused than I was in 17.



I've learned that in the small distance between being taken and missed, lives are changed, humans are drawn together. But I wonder still, why people sabotage this purest connection for the most petty matter, primarily for their own benefits.


I know there are no random acts, a relationship ended for its own reason, but didn't both individual gave themselves away just to stay together initially? How about the sacrifices made, tears shed and the happy moments shared?


I am clear that some people are just plain selfish, they can never love. I don't have an inkling of how can they find happiness and peace in themselves.


I understand promises are easily broken and not meant to be true. I refrain from believing in promises, but deep down I hope someone can prove me wrong someday.


I've also learned that some people are not worth defending. If they are noble and capable enough, they can keep themselves safe and climb up eventually. Still, I fail to stop myself from finding excuses to help them. I don't understand why don't I do things like i understood. This is a vicious cycle.

At the age of 24, confusion is still haunting me every single minute. Some of the decisions i made, reasons remained unclear, but I have no regrets and complaints. I know, someday I will figure out the answers and the balance to it all. And that is when all the weariness ,bitterness and wounds held inside me being washed away.


xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kawan-kawan sekalian,

In conjunction with my coming birthday in just 10 days, please donate RM1 to Ying Hwei's fund to help me to buy a disco ball. My room seriously needs a funky element. Whooppp!!!!!

Happy birthday to me and Happy Valentine's Day to every of you! :D

mother of all mother fuckers

SEW KAU YOUR MIND EFFING BITCH'S MOUTH.

damn kau emo la, can't you just act like your age you mother fucker.

urghhhh..

ok, enough ranting. back to work.

Are you happy today?

:)

and :D

and you know why.

HAPPIE FREAKING NEW YEAR EVERYONE


p/s: i;ve already updated my blog.

fuh!

like you don't already know.

my blog has a new facelift.

:D

ah! sial!

Ah sial , I've finished my last patch of salonpas!

S.O.S! 3 more needed for my stiff shoulder!Should have grab Salonpas's 3-pack promotion while i was loitering in Guardian today.

Dang, I am not only ageing prematurely, my back is also in the process of becoming a sticker book in collection of Salonpas patches.

Anyway, travelling down to Kuantan agian. Seeing doggie in 14 hours time, wheeeeee.

you

I am hwei's pen drive.

I think she's annoyed at me.

I think i am doing a good job all these while, why is she still annoyed?


xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


I am yours truly, owner of the pen drive.

I think you know i hate you.

I think you know too, i have to use you because I've gave my cute blue pen drive to my dad.

Yes, you are right, for couple of times, i wished you were lost.

Yes, for most of the time, I've simply placed you anywhere, but you were miraculously found, without fail, everytime.

Kid me not if you still need the reason why I hate you. Don't you know it's not your problem?

I tried to disown you, and you are still stick with me.

I guess, no body wants you too.

You'll have to make do with me, like I do the same to you, too.


xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Dang, i am not acting like myself agian and worst, I am talking on behalf of my pen drive? or I am talking to my pen drive?

Can I not go to work?

Can I just take one step behind, or like SueWinTheDiplomat said, to look for that god damn balance point?

Dang, why am i born stubborn? Dang.

Damn mengada.

phewwwwwwwww, lucky me

I know one day, he will become a lala, a TRUE lala.

I never want to admit that i have this thought, for it may backfire my taste for man.

For better understanding, this is the definition for lala.

Lala [la la]
– noun

1. A person who lacks sense of taste for clothing, and sometimes his/her colour coordination can very bad and bad in language selection: Damn, look at his clothes with dragon pattern and that carrot cut jeans, such lala-ness.

—language translation for: lala
Chinese: 啦啦, loosely translate in Hokkien: Ah Beng


ish, i am talking bad about people agian.

crankiness!

bitch,
side kick
front kick
double triple slaps
and i will also sew kau your mouth.

ish... geram geram geram

won't go away

it has been long,

for me to stop and think,

or not to do anything else.

stay still, in dead silence,

just to let my thoughts run.

because ,

i dare not to leave a moment unoccupied,

i dare not .


Life is deceiving.

For one moment, you thought you had everything tucked properly in place. Work, friends, puffs, heaps and heaps of activities, just to make yourself busy. Such smooth schedule arranged you thought. Such seamless surface. you assumed, you almost had it behind.

deep down you know,

you, are living in denial.

it still follows you around everyday.

it still crawls to you, wakes you up soaking wet,wreck with guilt.

you, know what you did.

you, will never get far.

i hate putting titles, but i can't leave this blank

people said when an inaccurate statement is made often enough, then it becomes truth.

repeat after me.

i love my job. i love my job. i love my job. i love my job.

i love my job.fuck it.i love my job.

i love my job. i love my job.

i love my job.

ah, i love my job.

do you know

a pig's orgasm last 30 mins?

gosh, great 30 mins swirling in the pool of orgasm.

i am so fucking absolutely wanna be a pig.

Teaser aye!

disclaimer: this entry serves purely for my own pleasure, you may only agree with me, especially the 2ps in my office.

yeap, showing you one of the many pix i took in Hanoi.

hardly can see any of this street scene in malaysia , such simple life.

ah, such great pix, couldn't believe it's taken by me.

Pwroar!!!

my dear fellow slaves friends,

i am back to malaysia

malaysia is no fun

boohooo....